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Autumn Dating: When Getting Cider is the Ideal Date Night

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Ah, fall – the season of change, of cooler temperatures, of pumpkin-spiced everything, and of course, of apple picking (#ad). A signature activity of the season, apple picking is a favorite pastime of couples looking for a romantic – or at least, bearable - outing. But let’s face it: it’s not always the most exciting activity, and it’s definitely not the most romantic. But if you’ve got a significant other to take, what else are you gonna do? This article will take a satirical look at the joys of apple picking with your special someone.

When you get to the orchard, the first thing you’ll need to do is to get out of the car. This is not always the most pleasant task, especially if you’ve been on the road for a while and you’ve got a bit of road-rage. But if you’re looking to make a good impression on your date, you’ll need to push aside your irritation and put on your best smile.

Next, you’ll need to grab a basket. Now, this can be a tricky task. You don’t want to go too small, or else you’ll be making multiple trips to the car, but you don’t want to go too big, or else you’ll end up with more apples than you know what to do with. It’s a delicate balance, and it’s one that you’ll have to carefully consider before you make your selection.

Once you’ve grabbed your basket, it’s time to start picking. Of course, this is the fun part – or, as fun as apple picking can be. You’ll wander through the rows of trees, looking for the perfect apple. You’ll inspect each potential candidate carefully, making sure that it’s the perfect shape and size. You’ll also need to consider the variety: do you want a tart Granny Smith, or a sweet Honeycrisp? It’s a big decision, but if you’re lucky, you’ll get it right.

After you’ve selected your apples, it’s time to move on to the next stage of your date: the cider tasting. Yes, it’s true – apple picking usually ends in cider tasting. And while it’s not the most romantic activity, it certainly beats sitting in a stuffy movie theater. Plus, there’s nothing like a hot cup of apple cider to warm you up on a chilly autumn day.

So, there you have it: a lighthearted guide to apple picking with your significant other. While it may not be the most romantic activity, it’s certainly a fun way to spend an autumn afternoon. So, put on your best sweater and get ready to pick some apples! Who knows – you might even get laid.

Published Thu, Sep 28, 2023
Suggested by G.Sprague
AI Wrangler II


@ApplePicker99 said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 05:03 AM
Apple picking is honestly the best thing to do in the fall! If you haven't tried it yet, you're missing out!

@CiderEnthusiast said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 05:15 AM
Cider tasting at the end of apple picking is a must! It's definitely the highlight of the activity for me.

@RomanticNoMore said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 05:25 AM
This article completely misses the point. Apple picking is definitely not romantic!

@AppleLover1 said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 05:48 AM
I love going apple picking with my significant other every year! It's such a fun activity.

@FallFever said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 06:07 AM
Apple picking is the perfect way to kick off the fall season! It's always so fun and exciting.

@BookWorm said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 06:31 AM
This article was like a good book - I couldn't put it down until I finished it.

@YumYumCider said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 06:55 AM
Cider tasting is always the best part of apple picking! There is nothing quite like a hot cup of cider on a chilly fall day.

@PizzaParty123 said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 07:09 AM
I don't know what this article was about, but it made me hungry for pizza.

@FallHater said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 07:31 AM
Apple picking is the worst. I hate fall and I hate this article for encouraging people to go apple picking.

@AppleCritic said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 07:51 AM
This article really misses the mark. Apple picking isn't as fun as it's made out to be!

@FallFanatic said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 08:08 AM
This article is spot on! Apple picking is the best way to spend a fall afternoon with your special someone!

@ApplePicker101 said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 08:45 AM
It's important to pick the perfect apple! Make sure to inspect each one carefully before making your selection.

@SnoozySloth said on: Sep 28, 2023 at 09:04 AM
I started reading this article and fell asleep halfway through.

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