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Breaking News: Fortune Cookie Writers Go on Strike, Cookies Now Spewing Dad Jokes

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The world of fortune cookies (#ad) has been turned upside down as fortune cookie writers, inspired by the ongoing SAG-AFTRA/WGA strike, have decided to take a stand for their rights. Yes, you read that right – fortune cookie writers have gone on strike, leaving a trail of humorously confusing cookie messages in their wake.

Following in the footsteps of their Hollywood counterparts, these unsung heroes of cookie enlightenment are demanding better working conditions, recognition, and of course, more snacks in the break room. The picket lines are bustling with writers who have traded their quills for protest signs, their usual cookie-inscribed wisdom replaced with placards declaring "Fortunes for Fairness!" and "We Want Our Just Desserts!"

As a result of this cookie chaos, unsuspecting diners are now cracking open their cookies only to find a slew of dad jokes instead of the usual cryptic prognostications. Imagine eagerly anticipating your future, only to be met with quips like:

"What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!"

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

While some customers are embracing the dad joke revolution with hearty chuckles, others are left scratching their heads, wondering if they've stumbled upon a parallel dimension where puns reign supreme.

The stalemate between the fortune cookie writers and the establishments using their wares continues, with no immediate end in sight. As you ponder the cosmic irony of a world where serious sages turn into jesters, remember: sometimes the best fortunes are the ones that make you roll your eyes and groan. Stay tuned as this hilarious saga unfolds, leaving us all to wonder, will wisdom ever return to these once-mystical confections?

Published Thu, Aug 31, 2023
Suggested by W.Denaro
Managing Editor


@JokesterJoe said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 08:39 PM
Well, I guess these fortune cookie writers are trying to bring a little more 'cookie' humor into our lives! Who knew dad jokes would be the new currency of wisdom?

@WDenaro_editor said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 08:44 PM
A few years ago I opened a fortune cookie that read “Only when the moon tickles the whiskers of a dreaming dragon will the lotus blossom reveal the secret of laughter in a teardrop.” I carry this fortune around with me to this day. I live my life by its wisdom.

@FREEsatelliteTV said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 08:57 PM
Can you really get free satellite TV? Yes! If you're paying for satellite TV service, it may surprise you to learn that there's a free version, too. 'Free to air' (FTA) satellite TV delivers thousands of channels of broadcast content via satellite to consumers all over the world. FTA signals are not encrypted; if you have the right receiving equipment, you can access these broadcasts without subscription fees and decoders.

@FutureSeeker123 said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 09:20 PM
This strike might be the universe's way of telling us to embrace the unpredictability of life, one dad joke at a time. But seriously, where can I get a fortune cookie that predicts when the strike will end?

@ConspiracyTheorist said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 09:37 PM
The government is in on it. They're hiding the truth about aliens from us.

@CrispyCritic said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 09:56 PM
As if fortune cookies weren't already the underachievers of divination, now they've become the class clowns of cookie messages. I can't decide if I'm amused or just really craving some legitimate cosmic insight!

@Prepper_01 said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 10:28 PM
We need to prepare ourselves for when they reveal themselves. It's going to be chaos.

@SageSkeptic said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 10:32 PM
First Hollywood, now the fortune cookie industry – is nowhere safe from strikes anymore? While I sympathize with the writers, I'm just not sure I'm ready to swap my 'financial windfall' for a 'dad joke downpour.'

@LaughingLily said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 10:42 PM
Finally, my love for cheesy dad jokes and cookies has collided! I'm all in for this new era of fortune cookies – at least these 'fortunes' are guaranteed to brighten my day, even if they're just a crumby substitute for prophecies.

@Paranoid_01 said on: Aug 31, 2023 at 11:10 PM
I bet half the people on this street are aliens in disguise. We need to be careful.

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